Note Pad, #3
Preparing for my honeymoon, breaking my no buy, and a touching memoir
A friend asked me the other day if I was packed for my upcoming honeymoon to Europe yet. I blinked in confusion. Packed? Already? It made me think! I couldn’t help but wonder, how early do some people physically put items into their suitcases for a trip? Typically, I dress for the weather and circumstances I’m in (plus there’s the obvious need for daily toiletries) so the clothes I’d take for a vacation (assuming I’m heading for similar temperatures) would be things I might be reaching for leading up to leaving. That is, unless you’re like my best friend who notoriously ignores the temperature when it comes to picking her outfit for the day - a standard operating procedure I *cannot* wrap my mind around but can’t help but admire for her spontaneity. Personally, I find myself unable to pack until the morning or night before I leave.
Now, mentally packing - that’s a completely different story. Because you know I have a capsule wardrobe moodboard with a running tally for the outfits I can mix/match plus a packing list that’s been in the works for weeks, right? Right? (Spoiler: That’s coming to you soon!)
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25 Bags And Shoes … How Were You To Know: I loved this piece from the New York Times on “The 25 Shoes and Bags That Transformed Fashion.” A very worthwhile read for those that love tracing the significant and memorable items that have shaped our culture. Some of the inclusions (the Candie Slide!) really brought me back.
No Woman No Buy: Well, folks. She broke down. I made it past the two month mark of my no buy. And then I caved. I’ll be honest, I really was holding strong. My Indyx digital closet was fully catalogued. I was screenshotting inspiring outfits and translating them into my own combinations with ease. I was closing out tabs and exiting carts without a backwards glance. I was taking stock of the things that inspired me and what I could let go of. I was adding things to my wishlist before adding things to my cart as a barrier for purchase. When I saw influencers whose fashion I love post about recent hauls or sponsored content my brain hummed with a contented, “I feel inspired by that. What can I do with my own closet that feels similar?” rather than the high pitched gerbil scream of consumerism that usually kicks in when I can’t whip out my credit card fast enough.
And then.
Well.
I reached the end of February and two bags (a product category in my closet that I’ve wanted to expand upon in 2025) that I had had on my list for literal years whispered to me from beyond the veil of my Google Chrome browser.
The first was this leopard tote. If you’ll recall from my Three Style Words (Minimalist, Edgy, Classic) I had specifically said I was looking to add more animal print into my wardrobe. This particular bag had been on my list for a long time - but had been out of stock for months. It was March 1. I successfully had two months of not purchasing anything under my belt. I casually checked in on its status - just to see. It was back in stock. Reader, I pounced. She arrived this past week and she’s so lovely. Slouchy. Fits comfortably on my shoulder. I can’t wait to style it as that edgy “pop” with neutral basics and my favourite gold jewelry pieces.
In fact, I wore it this weekend on a coffee and Sephora run with just jeans and a sweater and was immediately greeted with not one, not two, but three compliments before I managed to get to the fragrance section. Delightful!
The second was this woven shoulder bag. As a devoted Cup Of Jo reader, I’ve had the brand Clare V on my periphery for years and years (Joanna even did a collab with CV back in 2018). With my honeymoon in Europe on the horizon (Spoiler: I leave today!), I had the thought that I could really use a new bag that would be most ideal for heavy travel.
With that, I had a few absolute hard requirements.
This bag needed to:
Be able to be worn multiple ways (shoulder, crossbody)
Had a zip top closure (particularly important, I felt, for travel)
Roomy dimensions to lug a lot of stuff (again, esp for travel)
But not be *too* big
Genuine leather
Bonus textural element
The Moyen Messenger fit the bill well and it came in the most stunning zig zag Evergreen leather colour. So when it popped up on the Clare V Resale site for half its retail price, it felt like fate. Hopefully she’ll look good not just on European streets, but also on the beach, and rolling countryside. I’ll keep you posted!
Lift (My Lashes) Up: I’m in prime vacation beauty prep mode. You know the week before vacation when ALL. THE. APPOINTMENTS. have to happen (wax, mani/pedi, etc). Well, given all the beach time that will be had (and also perhaps less makeup in general as I try to soak up this special time with my new[ish] husband to be unvarnished and at peace and with each other) I thought I’d try a lash lift! I’ve had a few lash extension appointments in the past ahead of vacations. Many techs told me based on my natural lash length I’d be a good candidate for a lift instead. Finally, I gave it a whirl. And WOW. Game changer!
Easily the part I dislike most about washing off makeup is mascara. But I love a fluffy, curled lash. Especially because mine are so stick straight. This just solved all of that and should last weeks upon weeks to boot. I’m a believer in the “high maintenance to be low maintenance” philosophy (infrequent but fussy maintenance / procedures in order to lessen the daily “prep” load) and this is definitely that.
Scents Memory: Have I mentioned I’m going on my honeymoon yet? I kid. But! I love attaching a perfume to a time in my life. Every time I get a whiff of my wedding fragrance or my favourite Taylor fragrance or even the very first fragrance I ever bought with my own money (Curious by Britney Spears you will always be famous to me) it takes me back to a time and a place in my life. (Fashion and music give me that same feeling.) This weekend, I popped into Sephora for some fragrance shopping — but with Mr TSS in tow. We have different preferred scent profiles. I love scents that have a leathery musk to it, with an edge of sweet. He likes a bright fruity floral. Who knew! I told him that I wanted him to pick a fragrance I’d wear for our trip. It felt important that it be something he thought of fondly, too. This was his pick — a candied fruity floral way outside my typical comfort zone. FWIW, my picks were this bright citrus (an out of the box choice for me) and this sweet gourmand from the Replica line with scents that happened to be inspired by the places we would be visiting on our honeymoon.
Dear With Love … Sincerely, A Joyful Watcher: I’ve been slow dripping episodes of With Love, Meghan — Meghan, Duchess of Sussex’ new Netflix show — this week. I’ve been trying to make it last as long as I can rather than bingeing the episodes all at once. I’ve been a fan of Meghan’s since The Tig days. I was happy to see her shining brightly and in her element on my screen. The show felt like a much-needed salve from the state of the world. It’s a heartful reminder that unfettered joy is the most beautiful form of resistance. I also, of course, was swooning over all. the. fashion. I was particularly charmed by her “high/low” acknowledgement. LEWKS indeed!
A Caring Package: I loved Jenny Rosentrach’s formula for the perfect care package she recently shared on . Her advice? Book + Beauty Product + Baked Good. “Customize the care package based on the recipient’s literary and baked good proclivities,” she says. Sounds perfect! I think mine would be Pride & Prejudice + Deliverance Serum + Almond Croissant.
A Jewel Of A Read: I’m two books ahead of schedule so far and I can truthfully point to my new (and okay - strategic) use of audiobooks as the reason. Much like being slow to adopting podcasts, I was slow to embrace audiobooks. I also think I hesitated because I couldn’t imagine a novel working for me in that format. Luckily, I’ve found that I absolutely devour an audiobook when it’s a memoir or a non-fiction book. Plus they’ve been instrumental in making commuting time or my cardio sessions feel more “productive” (not that this is the value measurement we need to apply to all our time).
This month, I read The Vegetarian by Han Kang (not for me) and The Wedding People by Alison Espach (a delight!) via eBook. I also read two memoirs on audiobook: Sociopath by Patric Gagne (fascinating) and The Third Gilmore Girl by Kelly Bishop (she’s led an incredible life). I also started a third memoir. This time it was Never Broken by Jewel. Her story is so harrowing, but more than that I love the way she writes. It’s exquisite. This section came from the foreword and I immediately knew I was in for something truly special. It had my heart in a vice.
I believe in you.
I believe we are whole, intact, and capable of claiming the quality of life we all deserve.
This I know: our essential self cannot be erased no matter what we endure.
The truth is that no one can keep you captive. No one can keep you unhappy. No one can keep you abused. Our lives rise to the level we accept.
I do believe we can rise from the screaming blood of our losses, of extreme pain, physically debilitating emotion, psychological neglect, and apathy, and not merely survive, but thrive. We do not need to let our histories or our losses define us except in the way we choose. We can use them as fuel to create real depth, beauty, connectedness, and compassion in our lives. Our stories can make us exceptional people, not damaged ones.
So cheers to you, my fellow exceptional people, and the choices we make every day that bring us closer to depth, to beauty, to connectedness, and to compassion.
Your turn! Would you please answer these for me?
What is a quote you live by?
Describe one moment of joy from this week.
What is your packing style? A chronic overpacker or underpacker? Carryon or checked bag? Weeks in advance or hours before? Dish!
What would be in your personal care package? (Book + Beauty Product + Baked Good)
Loved this article! And loved the new purses! I would like to try to add a splash of edgy to my style game as well and this gives me good inspo.
1. "Never be so clever you forget to be kind" - Taylor Alison Swift
2. My dog napped on my chest while I was relaxing on the couch on Sunday evening 🥲
3. I make a packing list weeks in advance (keep adding to it as I remember things), but I put the items into the suitcase (normally just a carry on) the day before I leave! I aim to make things easy for myself on the trip so I try not to overpack by laying out outfits before putting them in my suitcase. I try to make as many ensembles as I can. And then upon my return, the laundry I have to wash is less overwhelming 😂
4. A quintessential rom com, some Crabtree & Evelyn hand therapy (for my chronically dry hands), and a chocolate cupcake with vanilla buttercream frosting!